~
i don’t even carry my notebook with me anymore. the kids move around me too fast to give me a chance to write down our familial follies. fatherhood is a trip; a nonstop trip to japan and back. last night, after I finally put the baby to sleep, i sank into the red lazy boy with a notebook to see if I could put the pen to it. but after a long day of rearing the youngins, the lazy boy make me out to be a lazy boy. the pen drops in between the cushions with the rest of my forgotten tokens. by the end of the day I feel too sorry for myself to take my thoughts seriously. i let them flutter through my mind and I treat all my emotions as if they are fleeting. it’s the top of summertime and the longest days of the year feel like they’re filled with a few short moments. i no longer got the time to give myself credit. i don’t even carry my notebook with me anymore.


